Jamie Wood Gemma McLean-Carr is a PhD student at the University of Edinburgh working on a project about smell, odour, and British perceptions of China and ‘Chinatowns’ (1842-1946). She studied for a BA in History at the University of Lincoln from 2019-2022 and went on to do an MSc in Contemporary History at the University of Edinburgh. This blog post is a lightly edited version of final piece of coursework on the Teaching History module, which she took in the final semester of her undergraduate studies at Lincoln.
2024 Reflection
When I completed this project at the end of my undergraduate studies in May 2022, I had just accepted an offer to begin my postgraduate studies at the University of Edinburgh. Everything suddenly felt very real and overwhelming. My time at Lincoln was ending and COVID-19 had largely taken away my first and second years at university. This project arose from these fears but also the silence about ‘Imposter Syndrome’ that I felt as a first-generation student navigating the tribulations of higher education. Now, as I have begun my PhD, these feelings have not disappeared (rather, if anything, the pressure not to be ‘discovered’ as an imposter has only increased). However, this project allowed me to be more up-front about my struggles and experiences. When I concluded this project in 2022, I suggested that the teaching of history needed to be re-evaluated and questioned, a process I said that the sector was not ready to address. At the time, the results of my project felt quite pessimistic; I felt that Imposter Syndrome was simply part of academic life and there was nothing that could be done about it. Looking back, my attitude towards this topic is not as damning, rather my own experience of Imposter Syndrome has allowed me to question myself and pushed me towards taking opportunities I never thought possible. As I begin to teach undergraduate students next semester, this project will inform my teaching and hopefully continue to make me a better academic, considerate of one of the main hidden struggles present in every aspect of university life.
If you’d like to read Gemma’s full report, follow this link.